Friday, March 29, 2013

spring break.

Why was I not here? Why am I not here permanently?
Contrary to the above photo, my spring break has consisted of:
-Working for 2 days
-Going back and forth literally 700 times between going to P-town and staying home
-Deciding to stay home, mostly based off having no motivation to pack
-Sleeping in
-Eating anything and everything terrible (including a strange craving for hot cheetos. Please don't ask.)
-Watching a million hours of Desperate Housewives on netflix
-Watching my sweetest little dude nephew and having so much fun eating french fries for lunch and swimming in the jacuzzi
-Not doing my hair or putting on makeup for 3 days straight (going on 4... holler)
-Laying out but mostly getting pink instead of tan
-Re-reading The Great Gatsby in preparation for the movie
-Watching bball with my pops
-Napping at all hours
-Luv It's and Scandal with Kori and Stefan (highlight of the week, for sure)
-Making these sugar cookies after seeing them on pinterest 87 times
*quick review- yummy, but not as great as advertised. Don't really taste like sugar cookies, a little harder than I would like. I didn't make their frosting because I ran out of powdered sugar so maybe that makes a difference? I just used some spare rainbow chip frosting... because who doesn't have rainbow chip frosting lying around at all times?
-Finding a Marc Jacobs bag I've been wanting for FOREVER for HALF OFF at Nordstrom Rack!!! The rack gods were with me that day. Bless them.

Does this sound incredibly boring to you? Because mostly it was incredibly boring. For my final act of Spring Break tomorrow, I plan on waking up really late and maybe going to return some things at the mall but only if I fell like actually putting on makeup. And most definitely watching lots and lots of Desperate Housewives. Go out with a bang!

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

a girl's guide to bracket busting

Oh hey there, March Madness!

It's so good to see my favorite time of year has come around once again. The NCAA Tournament starts tomorrow and I thought I would stop by and give some of my tips on how to maybe, possibly win your office pool... or flame out in a giant blaze of glory. Hey, you felt super confident in that 16-seed upset you picked! No need to be ashamed. What are we if not risk takers?

no texas in the tourney? apparently you CAN mess with texas.
ALYSSA'S GUIDE TO BRACKETOLOGY
1. Never pick Duke to win. Trust me on this one- they're evil, and you don't want that evil thrust upon you if you have to root for Duke. Make them go decently far (Sweet 16-ish) and then have them crash and burn.
**Exception to the rule: reverse jinx. If you have insanely bad luck all the time, cheer your little heart our for Duke. That way they'll for sure be upset.

2. Pick Kansas. The only reason I say this is because I did not pick Kansas this year. I picked them to win it all 2 years in a row and they got upset in early rounds. The next year I didn't pick them to win it, and they won it all. Then last year I didn't pick them again and they made it to the championship game. Moral of the story, I obviously have awful Kansas karma so do the opposite of me.

3. A 12-seed will beat a 5-seed almost every year, so pick at least one of those. My 12-seed upset pick this year is Oregon over Oklahoma State.

4. Never sleep on those mid-major teams. Remember George Mason a few years ago? No one picked them, and they made the Final Four. Same with VCU. Be brave with a mid-major pick.

5. ALWAYS GO FOR UNLV even if you are a little worried about them. REMAIN POSITIVE.
**This rule might only apply to me.

6. Don't pick a Final Four with all 1-seeds. That hardly ever happens. Plus, what's the fun in zero upsets?

7. Don't let your personal vendettas effect your gut. If your gut is telling you that your most hated team is going to win, go with your gut. Example: I would love nothing more than for the upstanding gentlemen at Harvard to assassinate New Mexico. But is that realistic? No. Therefore, I picked New Mexico.
**Exception to the rule: See number 1.

8. Fake it till you make it, homie! If someone asks you why you picked Iona over Ohio State, just say something along the lines of "Haven't you seen the way Iona totally dominates the offensive boards? Ohio State has got NO inside presence!" and you'll sound totally legitimate.
**I just made that up about Iona, so don't trust me on that pick.

9. Do You. Meaning, you can watch ESPN for 85 straight hours and hear how everyone is picking St. Louis as their sleeper pick for the Final Four. Guess what? It's not a sleeper pick if everyone picks it! Think for yourself, girl! (or boy. non-discriminatory.)

10. Have fun with it! Even if your bracket gets completely blown to pieces halfway through the first round, it's still a blast. And chances are, you'll have some sort of upset to brag about. The best part about filling out a bracket is that it gives you someone to root for every game. Settle in for the ride!

May the March Madness odds be ever in your favor!

Saturday, March 16, 2013

unfortunate events.

Sometimes I have bad days. One of these days happened on Friday.

I went into work early so I could leave to get to the hair appointment I'd been looking forward to for weeks. So after work I go get some french fries because- duh- it's friday, so any sort of clean eating has gone out the window. And I am driving down the road completely care-free and watching a homeless man hit people up for money at a stoplight when...


Bam... right in the back. Talk about a day ruiner... or a few week ruiner, but hopefully not a month ruiner.

Not to worry, I'm okay and walked away with nothing but a monster headache that will hopefully buzz off soon. Mini is another story. Poor little thing had to be towed and will be in the shop for (what I'm hoping will be) a little bit.


At first, I was really mad. Like when I finally got home I had to have one of those life's-not-fair-why-did-this-have-to-happen-to-me moments and just ugly-cry for a little. It's annoying when something is completely out of your hands and causes such an inconvenience to not only you, but those around you as well.

But I'm also really grateful. As you can see, we were the luckiest. The other 2 cars airbags went off and their cars were disasters. I'm extremely grateful that my car wasn't hit directly, because the dude was clearly going fast and who knows what would have happened to me in my little car. I also am lucky enough to have parents that dropped everything to come and help (and it certainly doesn't hurt to have a dad in the insurance business to get things rolling).

Real talk- Things could be a lot worse.

In the mean time, lets all pray that the body shop gods will take the best care of mini, because I kind of like her.

Monday, March 11, 2013

i'm always too invested.

I get really invested in celebrity relationships.
Like, REALLY invested.

Let me take you back to my sophomore year in high school, when Nick and Jessica were in their prime. Newlyweds was EVERYTHING and I think we can trace my reality television addiction right back to that very moment (well, that and Laguna Beach, but that's a story for another day. #teamLC).
I thought it was so wonderful that Nick and Jessica were so in love and so normal and just so dang adorable. Like the whole chicken of the sea thing? I ate that right up! Not literally, because I hate anything that comes from the sea. But she was so innocent and sweet and he just loved her. My friend Aubrey and I once watched the first season of Newlyweds in her mom's car on the way to do baptisms at the temple... hahaha so appropriate. We worshipped them!

happier times. 

And then it ended. And I was emotionally shattered and had my first really sad experience with celebrity relationships. And it didn't end there!
Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams? Crushed.
Emily and Jef from the Bachelorette? I felt personally offended. Like, we wasted a whole season!
Eva Longoria and Tony Parker? Devastated. I never really liked Tony, but how could you cheat on Eva? HOW???

I was at dinner with my bestie Sam the other day and we were discussing this. We came up with our ultimate worst case scenario celebrity breakup. Don't make fun of me for this.

this is what real love looks like.
KHLOE AND LAMAR.
I watched their wedding and cried. Fun fact: I had the wedding special recorded on my dvr for literally over a year just so I could watch it when I felt like I needed to believe that true love and fabulous weddings actually DO exist. If Khloe could find it, I can too!! Right?
If they ever break up, send help. I might need counseling.

Others on my devastating breakup list: Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner. Anyone else we should add to the list?

I can't even get started on tv character relationships. I could write you an entire essay on why Brooke and Lucas always belonged together over him and Peyton (unpopular opinion alert!), but we'll save that for some other time.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

it's march, ya'll!


Here's the rundown.

I'm having a hard time thinking about anything other than SCANDAL!! (side note- I just LOLed reading that back. What if I had some secret raunchy life full of scandalous doings? Like I said, LOL) Talking about the TV show, duh. Kori and Stefan got me hooked and now all I do is pretend I'm Olivia Pope. Girl has some FIERCE winter coats, ya'll.

Can you tell that I get invested in TV shows? Because I do. I could take a million pages writing about the bachelor so I can't even start, except to say I'm Team Catherine. Cannot get over wedding dress girl, sorry.

Oh one more Bachelor mention: If you didn't know, Tierra grew up in Vegas and it seems like everyone and their mother has a Tierra story. Half of them are that she's just as nuts as she was on the show, and half of them are "oh shes so sweet it's all editing". I don't know the girl, but I think it would have to be some extremely creative editing to make someone look THAT bad. If you have any Tierra stories, let me know!

I've been so busy these last few weeks that it seems like I haven't had a day off in years! All I can say is that spring break is going to be heaven sent this year. Lets all say a prayer for some good weather so ya girl can get some color in these pasty white legs.

I've been trying so so so hard to eat better and I feel like I've been doing well except all day long I crave circus peanuts. You know, the orange candy ones that are basically pure sugar? You guys, I cannot.stop. Send help.

I got the literal worst road rage of my life the other day. I only had an hour to go from one job to the other and I was starving so I was going to stop at in n out real quick (HAHA about that whole eating better thing) but then it took me the entire hour to get 3 stoplights down the street. You know what that means... screams! Horns! Fingers flying! (not mine, of course) Blast you, MGM construction! So I had to go to work starving and cranky and it was just not the business. Luckily our vending machine now carries fruit snacks, which I may or may not have eaten a double dose of to compensate for the lack of lunch.

OMG biggest news of all...
Did I tell you guys I'm going to ATLANTA in april to see my ultimate idol TAYLOR SWIFT?!?! Along with my secret ginger lover Ed Sheeran?!?!?! Me and boots get to go with our best homies the Grensings and then we get to go back with them to their sweet little Tennessee home. The south, guys! I literally cannot wait.